The Pursuit of Infinite Joy

On June 16, 1962 my parents were married. I tried to let the day go by without saying aloud that it was their anniversary. I thought of them with love. I tried to honor their memory silently. I guess I managed to get through the day without mentioning it, but I am not sure why I felt that need. Sometimes it doesn’t feel “right” that I should still be sad about losing my parents. But if have learned anything at all, grief never goes away, so the best way to handle it, is to welcome it when it shows up. Slamming the door in its face, doesn’t work. Grief is like a mouse–it slips through the cracks and skirts around the edges, both elusive and so damn there.

People keep asking me if I have finished painting the levee and the answer is no. I got a job. And it’s partly because of the levee that I am working again.

One day after being on the river, I passed the Leonardo DaVinci Museum of North America and I thought–what’s that? Then that very night I saw job postings for the museum and took that as I sign.

Yes. I am retired, but I always planned on finding a job at some point. It’s no secret that I left teaching pretty beat up. I promised myself that whatever I did next would be creative and fill me with infinite joy. And if doesn’t, well, I will dip out.

I don’t know yet if the job will bring me infinite joy. There are a few things I don’t love. One is stupid, but I hate being told what to wear. I think it’s my inner Catholic school uniform girl rebel that awakens whenever a polo dares to cross my path. The first couple of days, I wore a Renaissance costume. Honestly, I preferred that. It was more comfortable and it made me feel more like a person entering the realm of DaVinci’s lair. It also reminded me of Ren Fest and all the great summer days I have had there. It even kind of made me think about buying a pattern and making my own dress. I haven’t sewn anything in YEARS.

The other part of the job, I am not super crazy about is the drive. I know Pueblo isn’t really that far and I enjoy the amazing sky views and listening to the radio, but gas is pricey and there is a lot of road construction. I have thought about moving, but there is no ocean in Pueblo and if I am going to go to all the trouble of relocating there better be a beach in that plan!

That said, the museum is fabulous. It boasts a library of a complete collection of DaVinci’s writings. It literally will draw scholars from all over the world. Artisans of Florence created the exhibits and were on hand at the museum to give lessons about the pieces. Fabulous local artists created the murals in the museum. And there is an amazing STEAM room and inventors’ lab. I have been to a lot of museums in the US, a lot, and this museum ranks high on the best interactive museum list. It truly makes innovation, creativity, and DaVinci come alive.

I watched a twenty- something couple have a date in the museum. They were holding hands when they came into the inventors’ lab and did every activity– colored birds, constructed flapping wings, built wiggle-bots, wrote messages to each other with mirror writing, shot off straw rockets, played in the sand table and more. I watched them say “I Love You,” in the shadow room with shadows they made on the wall. Maybe they will get married and spend the next fifty or sixty years holding hands through all the seasons of love. It actually made me smile, and think of my parents. And filled me with hope.

A lot of kids come into the lab. I am enjoying them–it’s like having only the best part of teaching. Their eyes get big with wonder and they ask questions and are excited to try the activities. My favorites though are the older people. I watched two women, older than me, play with the gear panel for a solid thirty minutes, laughing and having a good time. Some people don’t come into the inventor’s lab because they think it’s for kids, but it’s not. It’s for everyone and there is going to be something that invites, inspires, ignites, no matter what age. So, yeah, being in this space–infinite joy.

I am also super impressed with the people who created this museum. They are examples of passion and hard work coming together to bring a dream alive. The museum they built is a gift both for the community and the world. It’s the kind of place that is unforgettable and it’s exciting to witness the beginning and get to be a small part of its history.

So. I will finish the painting on the levee, and I have a stained glass job in progress, and I am writing. And now there are museum patrons to greet and engage.

Every day I heal a little more from the losses life has handed me. Not because the grief is gone, but because it has found a place to live alongside joy.

Maybe that’s what Leonardo understood all along—that curiosity is its own kind of hope. That making something with your hands is an act of faith in tomorrow. That imagination isn’t an escape from life, but a way back into it.

So Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad. Here’s to imagination, discovery and the pursuit of infinite joy.